Woman reveals horrific sexual abuse she suffered by her own FATHER
Woman, 23, who was sexually abused by her own FATHER for years – after he was freed from jail EARLY despite molesting young girls – reveals how trauma of his grooming forced her to develop EIGHT personalities in an attempt to keep herself ‘safe’
- Sammy, 23, revealed the horrific sexual abuse she suffered by her own father
- Despite the multiple accusations from girls, her mother didn’t believed he did it
- After police found out, her father killed himself when Sammy was almost 15
A woman has detailed the horrific sexual and physical abuse she suffered at the hands of her own father, which began when she was five and only ended when he killed himself just days before her 15th birthday.
Appearing on the We’re All Insane podcast, 23-year-old Sammy said she developed a dissociative disorder with eight alternative personalities cohabitating in a ‘system’ as a result of her traumatic upbringing.
‘I was five going on six [when the abuse started],’ Sammy explained to host Devorah Roloff. ‘It was that intense, immediate and repetitive trauma that really started that dissociative disorder system develop.’
Sammy said the abuse began in 2005, after her biological father – who taught music – was accused of molesting two of his female students, and the family subsequently moved from New York to South Carolina.
Sammy appeared on the We’re All Insane podcast to talk abut her traumatic childhood, where she suffered horrific sexual and physical abuse at the hands of her very own father
Sammy told host Devorah Roloff (pictured) the abuse started when she was as young as five years old, and continued for around a decade after that
‘[We were told we were] moving because my grandpa needed to be in warmer weather,’ she recalled. [But] there was definitely a time in our lives where our parents were trying to cover it up.’
Sammy’s family – consisting of herself, her parents, younger brother and older half sister – moved in 2005, despite her father still being involved in active trials over the accusations from the girls he molested in New York.
He was found guilty in 2010 of sexual abuse in the second degree, but was released early on good behavior, after serving, what Sammy believes to be, around eight months in prison.
When he returned home in 2011, she claims the abuse ‘skyrocketed.’
‘When I was younger – probably like ages five to seven – I was probably molested once every two weeks [and] after he got out of jail in 2011 I was getting abused multiple times a week,’ she told Devorah. ‘I actually got my menstrual cycle when I was 11, it just increased the contact that he needed to have with me.’
Sammy said her father would also constantly pit her and her older half-sister – her mother’s daughter – against one other, recalling she grew up ‘hating’ her sister only to realize later she was also being abused.
‘[My sister] was one of the only victims to come forward and say this definitely happened to me [and] this is f***ked up,’ Sammy recalled. ‘They were so strong about it and it threatened my mother’s reality of what had happened and who her husband was.’
She added it was also ‘vital’ to her father’s grooming system to make sure they were kept apart, so they couldn’t reveal the abuse to one another.
The now 23-year-old has no contact with her mother anymore and hasn’t spoken to her in two years
The survivor of incest sexual abuse recalled some of the tactics her father would use to groom her, like pitting her against her older sister and threatening to commit suicide
Sammy detailed other psychological parts of her father’s abuse, saying he was around her for her entire childhood so he could ‘mold’ her exactly how he wanted her to be.
She recalled him showering with her, shaving her and trying to convince her to take naked photos of herself.
The 23-year-old also detailed co-dependent relationships with friends, who later became one of her father’s next victims.
When a friend came to Sammy and told her what had happened, she admits she thought her friend was lying at first.
‘I like “how could that have happened?” But really I felt threatened,’ she acknowledged. ‘I was not mad he was molesting her, I say I was mad that he was molesting someone else.’
Another tactic Sammy’s father used to undermine her was by threatening to kill himself – something she said he had done consistently growing up to control his victims.
‘[He’d say] “I’m so close to killing myself” [and] I would allow him to molest me because it would give him another couple of days,’ she recalled.
The abuse reached an all-time high in early 2014, with Sammy being abused ‘morning, noon and night’ by her father, recalling missing 92 out of 180 days of school to stay home with him.
Sammy stressed the importance of getting help if you need it, and to trust your gut instincts
She even claims that her own mother witnessed the abuse but decided to ignore it.
‘There were times that my mom walked in on him molesting me in their bed,’ she said. ‘He would [have] his hand in my pants or my shirt – my mom would just walk in on it and go right past the bed to the bathroom.’
However, after her friend started distancing herself from her family when she was around 14, she believes her father knew he was going to be caught.
‘My dad’s caseworker (as an offender) reached out and was like you have another accusation on your case,’ she recalled. ‘At that point, my dad would have been in jail for life because being a reoffender as a sexual offender doubles your charge.’
What is dissociative disorder disorder?
Dissociative identity disorder (DID) is a mental health condition.
According to the Cleveland Clinic, people with DID have two or more identities, and these personalities control their behavior at different times.
DID is very rare and affects between 0.01 and 1 per cent of the population. It can occur at any age.
Women are more likely than men to have DID, and the disorder often forms as a response from trauma, and is often the result of sexual or physical abuse during childhood.
Sammy said she spoke to the Department of Social Services for the first time ever in 2014, despite living with a convicted sex offender, saying Adelaide – one of her dominant personalities – ‘took over’ and admitted to being molested by her father.
In the months following, Sammy said both of parents accused her of lying, and the stress caused another personality to form.
On April 1, 2014, police came to Sammy’s house to arrest her father after months of him threatening suicide, only to find him not in the home.
They later found him dead the in space he used as an office.
Sammy described the next few years at school as ‘intense,’ recalling defending her father’s memory.
However, when she attempted suicide at 17, it triggered her dissociative disorder system, which involved multiple personalities spawning to help her deal with the waves of trauma she was constantly facing.
Sammy explained that Adelaide, who’s currently ‘fronting’ her personalities, is the protector of the dissociative disorder system.
‘That means they’re the trauma holder, they take on the trauma to keep the host of the system safe,’ she explained.
Another personality was Tristan, who developed when she graduated high school, describing him as ‘very much a protector’ in her system.
When Sammy was 21 she chose to leave home, and no longer speaks to her mother.
‘I don’t speak to my mother anymore because to this day if I went to her and said your husband molested me she would tell me I was lying,’ she claimed.
Sammy stressed the importance of getting help if you need it, and to trust your gut instincts.
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