DEAR DEIDRE: I LEFT my wife and two kids for a cocktail waitress and all I can say is: The grass definitely isn’t greener on the other side.

I’d been married for ten years and have two little boys. My wife and I met when we were both 19 and we are now 34.

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Everything fell apart after a night out with a mate.

My head was turned in a cocktail bar by a stunning-looking woman who worked there. She looked like sex on legs, with her beautiful smile and amazing figure.

When my mate saw somebody he recognised and went to chat, I grabbed my chance and went over to talk to her. I felt some sexual chemistry straight away.

We met in a pub the following night. She’s 29 and we got along so well that it felt completely right kissing her.

I felt slightly guilty but me and my missus had been through a long spell of arguing and hardly any sex.

Within the week, I was meeting this girl and having sex at her flat most evenings after work. Things quickly developed into a full-blown affair.

Just before Christmas, my wife saw a message on my phone and I admitted I’d met someone.

She threw me out and although I knew I’d done wrong, I couldn’t hide my feelings. So, I’ve moved in with my lover.

But my girlfriend is a control freak. She doesn’t like me seeing my kids. She wants to know where I am 24/7 and if I walk in the flat with my shoes on, she goes mental.

She’s now announced she’s pregnant. She wants to keep the baby, but I want to go back to my wife. She’s the one I love.

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I’ve been a first class idiot and think I’ve had a mid-life crisis.

I want to turn the clocks back. What can I do?

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DEIDRE SAYS: You’ve a lot of making up to do – if she’ll have you. And a new baby could be a game-changer, too.

You’ve betrayed and hurt your wife so be prepared for a lot of grovelling to prove this was a lapse of judgment.

Explain to your girlfriend that you rushed into this relationship when you should have been focusing on your marriage, but you’ll support her and the child if her decision is to go through with the pregnancy.

Find a couples’ counsellor for you and your wife through the British Association For Counselling And Psychotherapy, (bacp.co.uk, 01455 883300).

My support pack called Cheating – Can You Get Over It? will help you begin to tackle a conversation with your wife.

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