I cheated on my fiancee with a young girl on a boozy night out – but now I fear she’s pregnant – The Sun
DEAR DEIDRE: I THOUGHT I was better than all the cheating bastards out there but it turns out I’m as bad as they are.
I’m a guy of 27 and engaged to a beautiful girl of 25.
We’ve just bought our first home, we’re getting married next summer and I couldn’t be happier.
But I’ve done something really stupid.
I went out with the guys from work and got blind drunk, and I think I had unprotected sex in the toilets with a girl I’d just met.
I’ve always hated people who cheat and now I’ve done the same thing myself.
I was new to my job. I work on a building site and the lads all go out on a Friday night. We went from bar to bar but I’m not used to drinking so much.
I must have been on my seventh pint of cider when a girl started chatting to me in this pub where they played loud music and it had a club-type atmosphere.
She was pretty, about 18 or 19 years old. We started dancing then she grabbed my hand and took me into the toilets where she performed a sex act on me. I can’t remember whether we had full sex but, if we did, I didn’t use anything as I don’t carry condoms.
My mates from work all cheered when I got back to them. Now I’m so racked with guilt I can’t even look at my fiancée.
I don’t know this girl’s contact details or even her name but she knows where I work.
I’m terrified she’s going to pitch up on site and tell me she’s pregnant or, worse still, she’ll come along in nine months’ time pushing a pram.
Should I tell my fiancée so that it eases me of the guilt? Should I call off the wedding? Why did I risk it all for a stupid fumble?
HALF of women lose their sex drive but often neither they nor their partner know about the simple changes that can make all the difference.
SOMETIMES we fall in love so hard we’re blind to reason. Even if a relationship is clearly damaging, we cannot stop.
This obsessive love usually follows an upbringing that left us with low-self-esteem. My Addictive Love leaflet can help if you need to break free.
DEIDRE SAYS: You made a mistake but you’re human and we all make mistakes sometimes.
If indeed you did have sex, I can’t promise you that girl isn’t pregnant but the odds are against it. Indeed she may have been using protection herself, but it would be a good idea to get a sexual-health check to be on the safe side.
Telling your fiancée you cheated will bring all-round misery to you both. You did something you regret and now you will have to live with your conscience, but what matters is to learn the lesson from this – that we can all do the most self-destructive things when out-of-control drunk.
Stay sober in future and turn the guilt you feel into focusing on your fiancée and making the most of your relationship.
If the girl turns up at your work saying she is pregnant and it’s yours, insist on a DNA test because sadly I doubt you are the only guy she has got sexual with recently.
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