Boxer-clad father jokes about the most British burglary ever
Is this the most British burglary ever? Father reveals how he came down in his boxers to confront an intruder who was armed with a pack of tortillas, mild salsa, three DVDs and newspapers
- A man home alone thought he heard his ex-girlfriend return for her belongings
- But as he went to confront her, he was faced with an unknown male intruder
- He chased the burglar out of his house who dropped his belongings on the grass
- Because he’d been disturbed the burglar had only managed to grab a few items
A father who was woken up in the middle of the night thinking it was his ex-girlfriend was surprised to come face-to-face with a burglar.
Wearing just his boxers he stumbled downstairs after hearing the front door open, ready to confront her for disturbing him so late to collect her belongings following their split.
Only instead of the 4ft 11in woman he was expecting he found a 5ft 8in man in a hoodie standing in his hallway carrying multiple bags.
Recalling the entire moment on Reddit, the brave father dubbed it a ‘very British burglary’ because of the items the intruder had with him before making his escape.
The father explained how the burglar gained access via the back door and was disturbed when he chased him off in his boxer shorts
‘When I went to inspect the contents, I discovered that the poor guy hadn’t had time to steal anything of mine,’ he said.
Listing the items in the recovered bags the burglar had three DVDs (8mm, Transporter 3 and Hot Tub Time Machine), an open packet of Sainsbury’s lightly salted tortillas, an unsealed pot of Sainsbury’s mild salsa, a Stanley knife, three Newspapers, a packet of Piriteze anti-histamines and multiple assorted chocolate bars.
Before thinking about whether the burglar was armed the man chased him out of the house in his boxers.
The father admitted he’d been ‘incredibly stupid’ with his actions confessing in the post he didn’t even think to check if the burglar had accomplices with him as his children were asleep upstairs in bed.
‘I guess being chased by an angry (almost)naked man in the dark scared this chap more than one would expect, and he dived into someone’s front garden, abandoning his multiple bags on the turf and crawling beneath a bush.
In a bid to escape quickly the burglar left behind his belongings which contained several random items
‘I picked up his bags, told him to f*** off, and walked home.
‘Upon my return home, I emptied out the bags to recover my presumably nicked items, and prepared myself a succession of drinks using aforementioned ex’s alcohol.’
He explained how the burglar had only got as far as unplugging his PlayStation console before bolting, and realised that he had ended up ‘stealing’ from the burglar.
‘So in the end, I essentially robbed my burglar. If you’re on here, random burglar guy from Eastbourne, I have your s***.
‘I’ll happily give it back to you because most of it smells weird anyway. Sorry for robbing you, I guess,’ he joked.
The father later explained that the burglar had gained entry in the back door which had accidentally been left open, he believes, by his mother.
Source: Read Full Article