Have the best sex of your life – top tips on vibrators, orgasms and fantasies

Regular romping can boost heart health, help bladder control and even fight off illness.

As well as the physical benefits of sex, there are plenty of mental ones – it reduces stress and can ­strengthen relationships.

But it is easier said than done when you are tired, bored and busy with work and kids.

Psychologist Emma Kenny says: “Having good sex means you like each other and that you work at your relationship.

“It means you accept the other person has needs and it makes you feel attractive.

“So if you are in a good ­relationship with a healthy sex life, you feel happier. Nature has connected us in that way.”

Here, Emma, 45, from Manchester, gives her top tips to improve your sex life in 2019.

Share your fantasies

Sex is just adult play and it is the best adult play you will have.

Talk about your deepest ­fantasies – everything from role play to submissive or dominant relationships.

What matters is you put in on the table.

It could be something that is missing from your sex life, so plan and prepare to see if you can act out fantasise together.

Don’t fake it

In the early days with a new ­partner, people get into a habit of performing.

But if you are performing to impress someone you are rarely thinking about your needs. That could work at the start but not five years down the line when your ­mutual needs are key.

So do not fake an orgasm. Further into the relationship you could be left more unfulfilled when your partner does not ­understand what you enjoy.

Get steamy at least once a day

I think couples should try to have some sex every day – anything from a five minute quickie to a two hour session at the weekend.

You do not have to orgasm every time. What really matters is connection.

Know yourself

You need to explore, understand and appreciate your body. Because if you are really going to enjoy sex you need to be able to direct your partner.

Have a show and tell session. You know your body better than your partner and both of you have a right to show each other how you work.

It is crazy that couples share bank balances and children but they do not share thoughts on sex and what they want from it.

So show your partner what turns you on and what you like doing to yourself.

Invest in a sex toolbox. From vibrators to blindfolds, every man and woman should have one.

It means you are exploring yourself in a way that helps you understand your need levels.

Good sex begins with yourself and you need to know that before you can start to enjoy another person’s body.

Hot benefits

Having sex once or twice a week can give your health a major lift.

It is a good workout for pelvic floor muscles, so increases women’s bladder control.

And it can boost your immune system by raising the levels of illness-fighting ­immunoglobulin in your body, helping you fight off cold and flu.

Studies have even shown sex can help you look younger.

Emma adds: “It reduces stress hormone cortisol and releases serotonin, the happiness hormone, and oxytocin, the love hormone.

“These are key to bonding.”

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