Girlfriend wants to get married and doesn't know my transgender secret

DEAR DEIDRE: COMING out that I’m a woman trapped in a man’s body terrifies me.

I work designing and building new roads which is a male-dominated industry.

I’ve had lots of girlfriends and am currently dating someone who is talking about marriage and kids.

I know I’m not being fair. She knows nothing about my urges to dress and be accepted as a woman.

I’m 41 and she is 36. I long to be with a loving man and settle down myself.

I’ve seen my doctor and been referred for help but the fear pushes me back inside and I’m back to square one.

DEIDRE SAYS: This is such an unhappy life for you.

Don’t let this young woman suffer, too.

Even if you can’t cope with being honest with her yet, don’t let her believe you’re in this long-term.

You need support to help you decide how best to approach your family, friends and work about your decision.

Contact the Beaumont Society who help the transgendered community (beaumontsociety.org.uk, 01582 412220).