I had the best sex of my life with my childhood best friend but he's married
DEAR DEIDRE: I FINALLY had sex with a guy who’s been in my life since childhood – the snag is he’s married.
I’m just out of a relationship and, as usual, turned to this family friend for comfort. He’s married with two boys but I’ve known him since I was 12.
He is 41, I am 39. His parents and my parents met at their social club so we were always together playing outside.
Around the age of 14 we started to have feelings for one another, so would kiss and cuddle. By the time we were 16 we were exploring each other sexually.
I went off to college and he joined the Army. But we kept in touch and would still hook up when he came home.
He had other girls and I had boyfriends but I was gutted when he started to get serious with a girl. He got married to her when he was 25 and I was even a bridesmaid.
But we were still so close, even kissing when we had a moment alone at Christmas or at parties, and he was my confidante if I was worried about anything.
I ended my relationship with my boyfriend of two years recently after finding out he’d cheated. I’ve been feeling pretty down.
My lovely friend was in constant touch and last night he took me out for dinner.
After a couple of bottles of wine back at my place, I poured my heart out and cried and he held me close.
He turned my chin up to him and kissed me as only he can. But this time it went further.
He took me through to the bedroom and said, “I know what would make you feel better.” He peeled off my clothes and took me to bed.
I think 27 years of passion came to the surface and the sex was my best ever.
I know it was wrong and I shouldn’t let this happen again. But I need this guy in my life, all the time.
It’s now not just about him being there for me but I now keep thinking about the sex too. It was amazing.
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POSSESSIVE jealousy is such a poisonous emotion that destroys relationships.
My Dealing With Jealousy e-leaflet explains how best to protect against the green-eyed monster.
Email me for a copy or send me a private message on my Facebook page.
DEIDRE SAYS:There is a strong bond between you – so he should have known better than to have sex with you when you were already so hurt and vulnerable.
He made his choice all those years ago and married another woman.
You clearly don’t have any expectation that he’s going to leave her and his family for you.
Don’t settle for a dead-end sexual relationship where you’re going to end up being even more hurt and your friendship will be over.
Have a break from seeing him and contact other friends for support while you are struggling with your break-up.
If you can network through other friendships, you may find someone else for a special relationship.
My e-leaflet called Finding The Right Partner For You will help.
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